Long Nights with Knights

There was an episode in Grey's Anatomy dealing with karma or fate. Why do we do things we know we are going to regret? For me, it's having a headache. That's what I get for studying long hours, drinking my energy drinks in order to finish my work. I got all A's. I thought about my death today. I thought that if I died on duty, how meaningless could my life get? And my social life: none. It couldn't be more meaningless than it is right now. Why is it that I can't find much to write about? I have iconized Anne Frank, yet I cannot even begin to think like she did; she loved to write copiously, but not emptily. Anyone can write something; however, it takes an artist to write elaborate fantasies that lay rooted in the image of the soul. The writer and the poet are much ado of exuberant rumination. She made it her difficult endeavor to write and seek to write. There are so many stigmas that I use in my writing, viz. grammar taboos. Taboos are something I need to stay away from in my writing. Well my headache has now gone away. It feels better. I felt like I was going to die. I too love to write. I have written, and along with my writings, my teachers have praised my writing.

I do a lot of watching of TV on my computer. I need to do more reading and writing. My life is radically changed in many different ways. I am different in character and temperance. I think my dispositions have altered to a pathological degree. I am calmer in situations anyone would call disingenuous. I'm also more disciplined—I believe—in my studying habits. It's been a while since I have gotten straight A's. My love for science is increasing. There are a number of different philosophers that loved the sciences, especially in dealing with the substance problem of Locke. The reason I bring that up is because we as human beings look for meaning in the minutia of individual prospects—be that potential mates (i.e., soul-mates) or anything worth considering "meaningful." This is, I believe, my prospect in higher learning and science. I love the disciplines of the sciences, i.e. biology, biochemistry, and the science of interpretation—the bible included. I have been introduced to Michael Behe (author of The Edge of Evolution), a biochemist. He wrote Darwin's Black Box, where he argues that Darwin was critically wrong in his hypotheses that would show the theory of evolution plausible. Yes, the sciences are proving to be affinitive to me.